This week was a tough one. I was having some major emotional issues, dealing with jealousy and doubt. It was one of those times in my life when I couldn't be honest with myself or with Mistie about what I needed and it was showing through to the kids. I made them worry. Worry about there own security of what our family has become.
This is not new... I have seen this pattern in them before. The looks of concern... When either Mistie or I struggle to keep our emotions in check. I have always known that children are super perceptive but children of divorce are double perceptive. They notice every look every word every frown. And they try to protect. They offer Love and hugs to make it all go away. And even when I though I had myself back together the questions of what is wrong still linger in there minds.
Being a bonus mom is the most important job I have ever taken on in my entire life. I feel it is my responsibility as a parent to protect my step kids from as much of this cruel world as possible. I would do anything in my power to save them from heart ache and pain. But I also know I am not a robot... and that sometimes life will throw curveballs at me that smack me right between the eyes. When these bumps in the road come I want to show the kids that we as adults can go through tough things and come out better on the other side. They can learn valuable lessons from seeing adults work out their problems and move on back to the normal happiness of life.
I will forever be changed by these 4 wonderful, loving, caring, and thoughtful kids. Connor, Quinncy, Eligh and Sawyer I love you!
Till next time...
